Marriage is considered to be the ultimate personal goal for many. It is considered to be the master key to the treasure chest called happiness. People are bound to be happy after marriage, well that’s what is believed.
Old Hindi Saying
But there is one saying, which contradicts this.
शादी का लड्डू जो खाये वो पछताए । जो न खाए वो पछताए।
Means: “The person who got married regret getting married and those who are willing to get married are also regretting by not doing so.”
As per a recent paper by Mariah F. Purol, analyzed and compared three sets of individuals.
- Individuals with consistent long term marriage – consistently married
- Individuals who never married – consistently single
- Individuals who moved in and out of various relationships throughout life – varied histories
If we look around, we’ll find many examples of each one of the above. People having a long history of “happily married” as well a group of people that are long-time loners who thrive on self-determined solitude. As well as, some who aren’t sure of what they are getting into till they get into and then want to move on alone or to another one. They seem to follow :
“Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all”
The researchers found: “The consistently-married group was slightly higher in well-being at the end of life than the consistently-single and varied histories groups; the latter two groups did not differ in their well-being.”
So, the well-being of consistently and inconsistently singles are the same. But the married ones take the cake and enjoy it too.
“This suggests that those who have loved and lost’ are just as happy towards the end of life than those who ‘never loved at all.’”
One major highlight of the study was, that the married group was just slightly happy than the rest. If the consistently married group answered a 4 out of 5 on how happy they were, consistently single people answered a 3.82, and those with varied history answered a 3.7. So not a significant difference!
“It seems like it may be less about the marriage and more about the mindset. If you can find happiness and fulfillment as a single person, you’ll likely hold onto that happiness — whether there’s a ring on your finger or not.”
Ultimately, it zeroes down to the individual. YOU!
If you’re not happy on your own, by being single, the chances to be happy with someone else will not improve. Unless you improve your mindset, of being happy, nothing else will help.
